Foolishness

I've made a commitment to reading my Proverbs everyday for the next month. Coincidentally, it has 31 chapters and this month has 31 days. So 1 chapter a day works out for me.

King Solomon wrote the book and was considered to be one of the wisest men of his time. I started yesterday and read some today. The two things that he talks about the most is wise and foolish people, watching your mouth and offending people.

I find it ironic reading through it because some of the stuff he talks about used to describe me. For example, being quarrelsome and not listening to reason, me; scandalous behavior and doing wrong, offending people, all these described me in the past. Now I really understand what people were talking about. But why did it take me so long to learn these lessons? When what I was doing didn't really appeal to me? Maybe it was because i thought that it would be appealing to other people. I thought that doing these things would make people like me and in turn make me happy.

But I'm finding a balance in myself as I grow in wisdom and common sense. I'm seeing parts of myself that I new were there just never accepted. For some reason, I shunned those things about me. I suppressed that good part of me and let me bad part take over. But its such a beautiful feeling to know who you are and that you're growing.

This life doesn't come without its problems, in fact, I'm wondering if that's the reason that we're here to begin with. But I know that I wasted so much time when I was younger. I wasted 5 years of my life living foolishly and extravagantly. Like the prodigal daughter. Ugh, never again! Never again will I let myself go like that.

If there's a real change, my actions and my words have to be aligned. I have to live my life as one who believes what they preach. I believe in wisdom so I will live my life by wisdom.